(Spoiler: I haven’t really done anything.)

I normally steer away from tag posts, especially since I’m hardly ever tagged in anything. But this one seemed fun, and it was interesting for me to compile all of these tiny milestones into one post (albeit awkward at times.)

First app you check when you wake up in the morning?

Usually my gmail. 

First broken bone?

I’ve never broken a bone, actually! 

First foreign country you ever visited?

Canada, and I LOVED it.

First Instagram, Twitter or Facebook post?

I actually deleted most of my first embarrassing social media posts, so I don’t really remember. But it probably had a lot of filters and hashtags, since it was 2011-2012. 

First make-up item?

I used to do community theater, so naturally, I had a collection of cheap drugstore makeup. Wet ‘n’ Wild mascara was probably one of the firsts, and I also had one of those dark blue foundation compacts all the theater kids had to buy (but I can’t remember what the brand was.) 

CoverGirl Aqua Smooth AquaSmooth Compact Solid Foundation SPF 15 ...

First plane ride you ever went on?

I think I was six or seven, and it was on a trip to Disneyworld in Florida.

First time I ever got into trouble at home and school?

At home? I don’t remember the first time, but I used to get into a lot of trouble for picking on my brother, and he got into trouble for picking on me. The first time I got in trouble in school was in the 5th grade, when I got caught writing on a bathroom stall. 

First time you were allowed to put on make-up?

Sixth or seventh grade. I wore cheap BB cream, mint green eyeshadow, and mascara. Oh, and the Baby Lips lip balm by Maybelline. 

First YouTuber you subscribed to?

Gosh, I can’t remember! Probably Ryan Higa or Jenna Marbles.

First time you went shopping on your own?

My friend and I went shopping on “our own” for the first time in 6th or 7th grade, but what I didn’t know until later was that my mom actually followed pretty close behind us. 

My first BF/GF?

His name was Antonio, and he was my boyfriend for nine months when I was a freshman in high school. We’re on good terms; I hope he’s doing well. 

My First car?

Don’t have a car yet! Which is okay, because I can’t afford one.

My first Celebrity Crush?

Oh my gosh, David Bowie and Elton John. Still my celebrity crushes tbh. 

Best Elton John Songs: 20 Essential Tracks By The Rocket Man

My first cooking experience?

I don’t remember my first exact cooking experience, but I do know that one of the first things I learned how to make was boiling spaghetti. 

My first crush?

My first crush was on a boy named Ben when I was in kindergarten. We thought we were married and every time we hung out it would be our “anniversary.” 

My first ever cell phone?

It was a flip phone, and it was a brick. 

My first ever date?

A concert on Valentine’s Day. 

My first ever kiss?

First peck was with a boy named Michael in 6th grade in the science wing hallway, first actual kiss was with my first real boyfriend. 

My first fear?

I was basically afraid of everything when I was little. The things that stand out are hurricanes, tornadoes, fire drills, and spiders.

My first friend in college?

My first friend in college turned out to be a very toxic person.

My first heartbreak

Ending my first relationship was obviously sad, but being broken up with in my second serious relationship completely shattered my world because I did NOT see it coming. To this day, I still try not to think about it, and it left me with pretty serious abandonment/paranoia issues that I’m still tackling. 

My first Instagram post?

Oh man, I have no clue. I deleted my first Instagram account, but it was probably a selfie or something dumb. 

My first job?

I worked as a cashier at Marshalls for about two and a half years.

My first language?

English, and to this day, it’s the only language I’ve learned. I learned a little French in high school, but I’m certainly nowhere near fluent. 

My first love?

I did really love my first boyfriend, but I’m definitely glad that relationship ended and I feel like my tastes have really refined as an adult woman now. Nathaniel is just…10/10. Chef’s kiss. 

My first pet?

My first pet was a hamster named Cutie, and he was a SAVAGE. That dude figured out how to open his cage from the inside, and he would get out in the middle of the night and escape into our basement. We briefly lost him on a few occasions. 

My first piercing and when did I get it?

I got my ears pierced when I was 12, and that’s still the only piercing I’ve ever gotten. 

My first sexual experience?

Again with the first boyfriend thing. 

My first swear word?

Ha, when I was in middle school, my friends and I considered words like “hell,” “damn,” and “sex” to be curse words. If you said any of those things, you were pretty edgy. 

My first tattoo?

I actually do not have any tattoos, and I don’t have plans to get any. 

My first thought today?

Darn, I wanted to get up earlier.

My first time on a plane?

I think I was five or six, and my family and I were going to Disney World.

My first time on a ship?

Does the little boat that takes you to the Statue of Liberty count?

My first time on a train?

When my brother and I were little, our parents took us for a ride on “The Polar Express” one Christmas. It was actually just a service the commuter rail was running, and Josh and I saw right through it, haha. 

Hundreds of children board 'Polar Express' to South Station ...

My first toy?

My first and favorite toy was a small, blue bear who I named “Marshmallow.” He was my favorite little dude, and I took him everywhere.

My first tweet?

I also don’t remember this, because I think I deleted the first Twitter account I’ve ever made. I go through phases where I decide social media is toxic and I delete everything, hence why a lot of my current accounts are not my first ones. 

My first YouTube video?

The only thing I’ve ever posted onto YouTube was a project for health class in high school. It’s called “Spermtanic,” and you can still watch it! 

My first online profile picture?

I don’t have the picture anyone, but this was one of the firsts.

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The first book I remember reading?

I remember my mom reading The English Roses by Madonna to me all the time. I loved that book!

The first concert I ever attended?

I believe it was the concert I mentioned earlier, and it was for the band Kodaline.

The first movie I remember seeing?

I remember seeing Pirates of the Carribean when I was really little, and being scared shitless!

The first person I talked to today?

That would be my housemate, Erin.

The first person that ever broke my heart?

His name was Armando, and he was the second serious relationship in my life. Hope he’s doing well, though! 

The first person you text when something exciting happens?

Definitely Eli, 100%. And Nathaniel as well. Last night I texted him to tell him I saw two disgusting, giant beetles reproducing on my back porch while I was trying to take out the trash. He said that was “radical.”

The first text I sent today?

The first text I sent today was to my roommate, Erin, in response to her asking if I wanted to go shopping. And yes, I did agree! 

The first thing I do every morning?

I check my phone, brew my coffee, and make my bed.

The first thing I do when I get home?

I check the mail and usually get a snack. 

The first time you ever got drunk?

I actually don’t know if I’ve ever been properly drunk. I’ve been buzzed and a bit tipsy, but never flat-out drunk.

The first wedding I attended?

I attended a wedding when I was really little, but I don’t think it was anyone I was close to and I definitely don’t remember it. I think I was five or six. 

When did you go to your first party?

The first party I ever attended  was a Halloween party on Mission Hill, senior year of high school. 

When did you have your first sleepover?

When I was in elementary school, I used to have sleepovers with my neighbors and the kids in my neighborhood all the time. 

First time I got a speeding ticket?

I don’t have a license, so I’ve never gotten a ticket for anything!

First time I got in a fist fight?

I’ve never been in a fist fight, thankfully.

As you can see, I definitely have not done much, but it was still very enjoyable for me to go sift through all of these memories. I hope you guys enjoyed learning a little bit about me!

2020 has been an interesting year for all of us, and we’re only about halfway through it. Obviously, the global pandemic is causing a lot of chaos and turmoil in my own life, but that’s not the only eventful thing to happen for me this year. In fact, every month so far has more or less brought its own changes and milestones for me. Today, I want to go through the events of my life so far in 2020 and muse over them with you. We’ve still got six more months until 2021, and I can’t even begin to imagine what the next few months will bring to my life.

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January | Completely aside from coronavirus, like I said, the past few months have been an extremely eye-opening experience for me. Last September, I entered my senior year of college, and the third week of January marked my final semester as a college student. For a couple of reasons, I was entering my final semester with my head held high and a sense of relief and calmness. Fall 2019 had been a successful semester for me self-esteem and emotion-wise, but health-wise, I went through a really difficult period of insomnia and debilitating anxiety. I was looking forward to this upcoming semester because I had alleviated most of my insomnia and my anxiety, and I was really proud of the progress I had made with my health. Fall 2019 was also the first semester during which I felt really comfortable and happy with myself, so I was looking forward to continuing those friendships and seeing my friends again. I know that self-confidence doesn’t really develop overnight, but for me it kind of…did? Last fall, I really just woke up one day and noticed that I was happy with myself. I felt good about who I was and the person I was becoming, and other people seemed to notice the new me, too. I was laughing a lot and I was making other people laugh, which was an amazing feeling. This absolutely carried into January for me, and being reunited with my college friends felt so good! For the first time in my entire college journey, I was hanging out at other peoples’ dorms, eating with friends at the dining hall, and feeling comfortable giving presentations. I was also starting to daydream quite a bit about graduation (and actually dreaming about it as well;) thinking about how I was going to decorate my cap, visualizing myself walking across the stage, etc. Obviously miss ‘rona kind of killed that dream down the line, but oh well, that’s life.


February | February was probably the most confusing, stressful, wonderful, and turbulent month of 2020 so far, hands down. So where do I begin?

I guess I’ll begin on Sunday, February 2. I was single at that time, but I wasn’t really thinking too much about it or putting myself down about it. Actually, I was having the time of my life, and really enjoying going on casual dates, feeling really happy with myself, spending most of my time with my friends, etc. A couple of nights before Superbowl Sunday, on that Friday, I went to a small party at my friend’s dorm and had a pretty good time drinking wine and playing video games with my friends. I was supposed to go out on a date with a girl in Cambridge the next day, but when I woke up on Saturday morning, I was so goddamn hungover, I asked her if we could push it to Sunday instead. So we did. And on Sunday, I was still feeling like shit, but I didn’t want to cancel again because she seemed really nice and I was dying to get off campus. So I dragged myself out of bed, put myself together, loaded my Charlie Card with $4.50, and hopped on the green line towards Park Street. I remember being a little bit anxious about going out to dinner that night, predominantly because I was exhausted and I felt like shit, but also because I had basically zero dollars at the time and even the train fare was stressing me out. I also really don’t like taking the train by myself at night, and since I had to go all the way to Alewife from Riverside, well, I definitely thought about cancelling again more than once. 

So I got to Alewife, and the date was okay. Like I said, she was a really nice gal, but I definitely didn’t feel a spark with her and I was totally annoyed with myself on the train ride back to Riverside. It kind of felt like a waste of an evening, considering I was already debating staying in that night, and with the way things had gone at Bertucci’s, I was really regretting the evening. I got back onto the red line, took the train inbound to Park Street, transferred to the green line, and around 9pm or so, I transferred off of the shuttle bus and made my way down to the Reservoir station for the rest of my stretch back to campus. And then something unplanned happened.

While I was waiting at the platform, checking out all of the other people waiting for the train, I noticed a tall, good-looking guy with long blonde hair falling in his face leaning against the wall, with his headphones in and his nails painted black. But it wasn’t the fact that he was cute, hunky and blonde that caught my attention, it was the fact that he went to the same college as I did and we had had a class together last semester. So I decided to go over and say hi to him; particularly after the stressful night I’d had, it was honestly such a relief to run into somebody I vaguely knew at a random train station in Boston. He told me he had just seen Little Women by himself at the movie theater, and that it made him cry a few times, and he’d probably go see it again. I told him that Little Women was one of my absolute favorite books. We got on the train together, we rode the train together, and of course, we walked back to campus together, considering we were both going that way anyway. Turns out, we lived about a house away from each other. A few minutes before we parted, I offered up my phone number, and he texted me about five minutes later. “Hi, it’s Nathaniel!”

I honestly wasn’t expecting anything to come out of this interaction. Even though I voluntarily offered up my phone number, I still didn’t really think that anything would come of this. I mean, like I said, I was just busy focusing on myself and hanging out with my friends, drinking moscato and staying up until 2am every weekend. But then I started to make time for Nathaniel, too, and I discovered that he wasn’t anything like I had imagined before. Like I said, we had a class together in the fall, and I’d always sort of imagined him as this weed-smoking bro dude who probably liked to skateboard and listen to rock and roll. And yeah, he is into rock and roll, but besides that, I got everything else wrong. He was sensitive and inherently kind, he was a bit gritty around the edges but he still had innocence, he was painfully shy but he wanted to open up to me. So, naturally, we became fast friends with a surprisingly deep bond. We went for evening walks around campus together, musing over our shared interests (and our differences,) and we swapped poetry books and movie suggestions and music trivia. As for me, I wasn’t even self-conscious of overthinking anything at all, I was just happy to have him around, with no expectations and no pressure for any specific outcome.

Then, the day after Valentine’s Day, I was at a small party in my friend’s dorm. I wasn’t drunk (or even that tipsy, to be honest,) but I was definitely feeling really bubbly and happily delirious after all the laughing and a few sips of vodka. Around the 11pm mark, I was still wide awake, but I was feeling about ready to head out. And then when the girl across from me started throwing up salad in her mouth, well, that was my call to leave. Without even really giving it a second thought, I texted Nathaniel and invited him over to my dorm to watch Sky High, and he was there, in my room for the first time ever, in about ten minutes.

We DID watch the movie, okay? But then something completely unexpected happened, which was that we started kissing after the movie ended. And that night, I went to sleep happily with Nathaniel laying next to me, with bits of blond hair falling in his face, and the window was open, letting in the cold winter breeze to air out my room a little bit. And since then, we’ve been completely inseparable. Up until coronavirus happened and all the students were sent home after spring break, we spent about 3-5 nights together, listening to the Grateful Dead and stargazing, sitting on my roof and eating peanut butter crackers. 

When I started dating Nathaniel (or Buck, as his family and I call him,) I felt a sense of internal clarity that I had never experienced before. I’d been in love before, but this newfound love I’d found with him felt like I’d suddenly been let in on this big secret of the universe. Like I had discovered something magical that not everybody gets to experience until it happens to him or her, and here I was, staring at his sleeping face in the glowing moonlight, knowing without a doubt that I’d found my life partner, my perfect person, the man who I was going to marry and buy a house with and grow old with and probably have cute little babies with. And with that realization came the peaceful clarity of true love that so many of us find difficult to describe.

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February wasn’t all smooth sailing, though. With the addition of Nathaniel to my life, I also lost a beautiful, strong friendship with one of my favorite people on the planet. I can’t say very much about that, since it wouldn’t be right to breach her privacy and share those details on my platform, but I will say that a very huge misunderstanding turned into the ultimate termination of a friendship I thought would last forever. What I can say is this: if you know that you are doing the right thing for yourself in your heart, then that’s just what you have to do and you can’t beat yourself up about it. Losing that friendship as a result started dating Nathaniel really sucked, and I cried a lot and even threw up a couple of times because of how I was feeling about the whole thing, but eventually I just sort of had to reach an internal peace with myself. Like I said, falling in love with him gave me so much happiness and clarity, I just had to stop caring about what other people thought about me and us. After all, our love story only concerns two people- him and me. In retrospect, I can safely say I made the right decision.


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March | Ah yes, March, the month coronavirus really slapped me (and everyone else) in the face. I have to be honest, at the beginning of the pandemic, I didn’t really take it seriously. I was one of those people who compared it to a bad flu and believed that everyone was overreacting. I think everything started to really hit me all at once around March 12th, because that was the week my college announced that the campus would be closing after spring break and classes would resume online. Obviously I was terrified and saddened, but I actually didn’t react as strongly as you may be thinking. I honestly think I just numbed myself out to everything: no graduation, no senior week, no more friends…I just didn’t think about it and completely shut down inside. Even still, I haven’t even really thought very deeply about it; I’ve been feeling very reclusive and quietly angry about the whole thing, but I haven’t cried once. I packed up all my stuff, cut my bangs (lol,) said goodbye to what had quickly become my favorite place in the world those past few months, and moved home. I still haven’t seen any of my college friends since, except for Nathaniel, of course. Coronavirus could take away my graduation, my friends, my classes, and my spring break, but I refused to separate (both physically and emotionally) from him. It’s hard not being able to see him every day like I did at school, but we see each other fairly often, and we’re always very appreciative of our time together.

Coronavirus was really hard on my mother too, as a nurse in the Greater Boston area. There were a couple of times when she came home from work crying from frustration, and I felt terrible that I couldn’t do anything to make the virus go away. To be honest, we probably both had it at some point, considering we lived together and she was regularly exposing herself to the virus by going to work every week. However, I’m extremely proud of her for staying strong and resilient during the pandemic, and she deserves the very luxurious, lovely vacation she’s planning with my stepfather this summer (if the social distancing regulations allow it, of course.) 


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April | April was supposed to be yet another milestone in my life for me, since my 21st birthday was on the twelfth, but honestly, it just felt like any other day. I’m not exactly saying that in an inherently gloomy way, because I don’t like a lot of attention on my birthday anyway, but I was looking forward to drinking margs with my friends at Chilli’s instead of spending the day by myself, locked away in the apartment while my mom was saving lives at the hospital. Unsurprisingly, I don’t really remember my birthday, but that’s alright. I’m just thankful that I got to have one, and that I am able to be on this earth for another year, safe and healthy, surrounded (afar) by my family and loved ones. I don’t know if this happened in April or not, but around this time, I also started to feel much more like an adult and like a woman. I actually just looked in the mirror one evening and realized that I felt…different. I had been doing a lot of realizing and developing since January, so I think that played a large part in it, but I definitely have felt like a different, more mature person since then. April was quietly moving and substantial, unlike February and March, which really hit me like a bus. 


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May | Ironically, May should have been the most exciting month of the year for me, but it was actually the most boring. I will say that I moved into my first apartment, which has been exciting, but also very…lonely. I am grateful for the things I have and the support around me, but I can’t help but wish things were different. I wish I was walking across the stage in my cap and gown, like I had been daydreaming about all the way back in January. I wish I had a job and money to spend, instead of counting my quarters at the laundry machine and forgetting my debit PIN at Walgreens because I hadn’t even used a card in so long. I wish I was living with Nathaniel and waking up next to his sweet face every day instead of waking up alone at 4am with anxiety attacks and the train thundering right outside my city window. There are so many things that I wish had turned out differently, but that’s okay. When things don’t go the way I plan, I simply try to say, “I expected that,” and then I move on with my life and hope for a better tomorrow. Life will not treat you any kinder or any fairer just because you’ve been through a few things and you think you deserve it. 


Black Lives Matter: Marc J Spears on George Floyd protests and the ...
PC: Sky Sports

June | While the spring brought the devastating wave of COVID-19, summer brings its own sparks of chaos and turbulence. Police brutality, protests and riots, and the murder of George Floyd have been centric throughout the month of June, as they rightfully should be. It’s high time we discuss these horrible racial issues in our own country, and I am proud to be a part of such a critical movement. These uprisings across the nation have also given me an opportunity to examine my own privilege and work even harder at being a better person and ally for my vulnerable friends and surrounding communities. I have donated to organizations, signed petitions, and tried my best to spread awareness on social media, but the battle is far from over. If you have the time and resources, please consider doing the same! Additionally, it is more important now than ever to support black-owned businesses and companies. 

Although some may believe that 2020 is a horrible year, and I do understand that sentiment, I also believe it has sparked so much growth and conversation across the world. Rather than holding the mindset that 2020 is the worst year ever, I am trying to remind myself that 2020 could be one of the most important years for us. We must take these lessons and privations thrown at us and respond with strength, courage, and action- ranging from coronavirus to civil unrest. I truly wish everyone a safe and happy rest of the year, and I am looking forward to seeing where the rest of 2020 takes us. You are stronger than you believe, and I know we can get through anything!

It’s been a while since I’ve published any unpopular opinions, so today felt like the right day. I did one of these articles in the past, and I have to say, it’s a bit terrifying to put such unpopular views out into the world! That being said, I don’t think any of these unpopular opinions are particularly polarizing or problematic. Enjoy reading and let me know if you agree with any of my opinions!

Who is Billie Eilish?: The 17-year-old pop star ruling the ...

Celebrities

Singers I don’t care for/haven’t listened to much: Beyonce, Ariana Grande, Katy Perry, Billie Eilish, Harry Styles, Shawn Mendes, Camila Cabello, Selena Gomez, and Travis Scott. In fact, I think Billie Eilish is extremely overrated.

Lifestyle

I much prefer at-home workouts as opposed to going to the gym.

I’ve never been on TikTok or even downloaded the app. All the TikToks I watch are from Jenna’s Marbles compilation videos.

TikTok is the best place on the internet. We should all delete it ...

I love caking on a full face of makeup instead of following the dewy, natural, ‘glowy’ trend I’ve seen popping up in 2020. My skin is just way too textured and red for a ‘natural’ face!

I’d much rather stay in and watch a movie at home than go to a movie theater; movie theaters are boring and uncomfortable.  

Surfacebook Pro > Mac.

America should get rid of tipping culture and just set a fair minimum wage instead.

Making the bed is NOT a pointless chore!

Food

Milk chocolate is better than dark chocolate.

Coffee tastes best black.

All fast food hamburgers taste the same; I’m not sure why some people so strongly favor a McDonalds burger over a Burger King burger, and vice versa. 

TOMATOES RUIN SANDWICHES.

Other

Going on a hike or spending the day in a forest is much more fun than going to the beach or going somewhere tropical.

New England travel | USA - Lonely Planet

New England is definitely the best place to live in the US!

Everyone has the potential to be a good singer with practice.

Kids who succeed academically deserve scholarships over kids who excel at sports.

Cold better is MUCH better than warm weather.

College grads deserve to be paid a liveable wage.

And finally, babies should be banned from movie theaters.


I hope you guys enjoyed this article! Do we share any unpopular opinions? Let me know in the comments below!

In the two or so years that I’ve been blogging, it’s been really interesting for me to see which articles get more traffic than others. I have noticed that the articles which do best are the same ones that I had previously googled a lot about myself, so I suppose it makes sense that the search engines would push people in my direction. Today I’m going to go over my top 5 most popular posts and show you how many views they have earned (as of 4/18, the day I am writing this. Since updating to a premium plan very recently, the traffic for these posts has gone up even more!) 


‘Should We Be Worried About Julia Zelg?’

Julia Zelg - Online Personalities - Pretty Ugly Little Liar

Views: 4,439

To date, this is my most-viewed article on my blog. Even though Julia Zelg is not a particularly famous YouTuber, she has still created a lot of conversation on the internet, and there is even an entire forum dedicated to covering her. When you search for Julia Zelg on Google, one of the first things that pops up is that thread, and right below that thread is my blog. With that being said, I think a majority of my views definitely come from people who are trying to find more information or drama about Julia, and that is only further pushing my blog up in the search queue. I think it says something very interesting about our culture that drama and ‘tea’ is what will garner content creators such as myself the most views, don’t you think? With that being said, I totally get it. I mean, the title of the article is literally ‘Should We Be Worried About Julia Zelg?’ I’m sure Julia has read the article, and even though it could be perceived that I’m shining a negative light on her in the piece, I genuinely really like her as a person (I’ve met her) and I really hope she appreciates the concern of her fans. I also don’t think I’m going to be covering any Julia Zelg news from now on, even though it brings me a lot of traffic, because I think too much media scrutiny on her could be damaging for her well-being (even if it is well-intentioned, like mine is.)


‘Movie Meaning Monday: Is Coraline a Metaphor for Domestic Abuse?’

Shocktober: Coraline in North Kansas City at Screenland Armour

Views: 2,843

This was one of those topics that I had previously tried to research myself but could never find any information for, so I decided to go ahead and write my very own article about it. Apparently, a lot of other people were wondering the same thing about Coraline. Coraline is one of my absolute favorite films, and the more I watch it, the more I want to analyze it. In general, I absolutely love analyzing films, and I’d definitely like to write some more film articles in the future. I was really pleased that so many other people agreed with me about this topic, and I think there are several dynamic theories about this movie yet to be explored. It actually wasn’t getting too much traffic for a while, but in the last few months (around last September,) it randomly started to garner hundreds of views. To this day, I am very proud of this article. 


‘The Refreshing Elegance of John Maclean’

John Maclean: purveyor of refinement, elegance, and beauty ...

Views: 2,756

This article is very special to me because it was the first piece I wrote to be noticed by a “famous person,” i.e., John Maclean himself. John Maclean is a makeup artist and YouTuber based in London, and if you’ve watched his videos before, you’re definitely familiar with his unique style, impressive vocabulary, and overall vampire-esque beauty. I wrote this article to praise him for his individuality and creativity, and by some magic, he noticed it and thanked me via Twitter. After that, like I said, this was my first article to get substantial traffic after being noticed. I received so much love from other John Maclean fans as well, so that was an amazing feeling! Even though I wrote this article so long ago, I’m still very proud of it and I’m very happy John now knows how much I appreciate his work. I’m also so grateful to him for giving me a platform and a voice to share my writing. 


‘Movie Meaning Monday: Is Chitty Chitty Bang Bang an Allusion to Nazi Germany?’

10 things you didn't know about Chitty Chitty Bang Bang | The ...

Views: 1,733

Fun fact, on Nathaniel and I’s first date, I mentioned that I had written this article and he read it from start to finish right next to me. And then we had our first kiss about two seconds later, so that’s what I think about whenever I see this article pop back into my life (I know, it’s a terrible connection.) Like the Coraline article, this was a subject I did a ton of research on but couldn’t find a lot of other people talking about, so I decided to go ahead and write my own piece. Even though I think Chitty Chitty Bang Bang is a wee bit problematic, I actually really like this movie a lot because I grew up with it. Nathaniel thinks the article and my description is absolutely wild, since he hasn’t seen it in years. I can only imagine how somebody would feel reading that article if they had never seen Chitty Chitty Bang Bang. I’m pretty sure my entire description of it sounds like a nightmare. 


‘Berrylook: A Brilliant Scam’

BerryLook Review: BerryLook.com Scam or Legit - NOI
FAKE!

Views: 859

My fifth most-viewed article is an exposé of the company Berrylook, aka NinaCloak. Basically, they’re one of those scammy overseas companies that advertises fake clothing, steals your money, and then sends you absolute shit (or nothing at all.) I’ve never been scammed by them, but I almost was, so I decided to write a warning piece to other consumers who may come across their deceiving ads. Based on my traffic and response, it sounds like a lot of people were almost scammed or unfortunately had terrible experiences with this fake company. I’m glad I was able to offer a voice to people to leave their experiences in the comment, and maybe, I could have even saved somebody from almost ordering from this fake brand. Always be extremely wary before you drop money online, folks! 


So, that’s my summary of my top five articles, traffic-wise! Maybe down the line I’ll post a summary of my top five articles I’ve ever written, if that is interesting to you. Let me know what you think in the comments, and don’t forget to subscribe to my email list if you want to be notified every time I post! Thanks so much for reading.

Bora Bora Island Travel Guide and Bora Bora Deals | Tahiti.com

So, obviously I don’t have a million dollars, and the chances that I ever would are pretty much slim to none. But nonetheless, I wanted to post something silly, fun, and purely entertaining today, so that’s how I got the idea for this article! I have literally broken down every way I could burn through a million bucks, down to the cent. I even had about four thousand theoretical dollars left over, how nice! I’ll set aside a bit of that to ensure that I can upgrade my blog to a premium plan for the years to come.

Financial

Pay off my student loans – $50,000

Pay off my father’s mortgage – $150,000

Pay off my mother & stepfather’s mortgage – $67,000

Pay off rent and utilities for the rest of my lease – $10,000

Pay off everything else for the rest of my close friends and family – $100,000


Donations

Elephants travel to mourn the dead in faraway herds | World | The ...

The Humane Society – $15,000

Humane Farming Association – $15,000

Save the Elephants – $15,000

Planned Parenthood – $20,000


For Fun

The Retreat At Blue Lagoon Iceland: An Escape From Summers

Marry Nathaniel – $5,000

Honeymoon at the Blue Lagoon in Iceland – $1,000

Bora Bora maybe? $10,000

Japan, for sure – $10,000

John Mayer’s Autograph for Nathaniel – $200

Private Dinner with Sen. Bernie Sanders – $1,000

One Kindesign

Buy a farmhouse in Scotland with Nathaniel – $500,000

Adopt several cows – $20,000

About dairy cows | Compassion USA

Adopt ten dogs – $3,000

Start my own business – $20,000

Buy a pair of vintage Louboutins – $2,000

Buy everything that’s currently in my Amazon cart – $129.64

Buy a bunch of makeup – $500

What's next for books? | TechCrunch

Buy a bunch of books – $500

Meet Bill Murray – Priceless

Total: $995,329.64


Hope you guys enjoyed seeing how I would divvy up one million dollars if I had that kind of money! How would you guys divide your money? Let me know in the comments below.

It’s unbelievable to me that I’ve already had my blog for approximately two years. I started this project not knowing what direction it would go in and if anyone would even be interested in my writing. In fact, when I first started, I sometimes wondered to myself, ‘What’s the point of this?’

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Little did I know that my blog would quickly become of my favorite hobbies and pastimes, and beyond that, it’s even helped me in my professional life as well. When potential employers learn that I have operated a blog with a tri-weekly posting schedule for over two years, they’re usually impressed and interested in learning more. Not only has blogging so much improved my writing, it has also improved my knowledge of social media marketing, site analytics, graphic design, and general organization skills. For that, I’m so grateful to have WordPress as my teacher!

I never get tired of what I do. I love this site, and I love interacting with my readers! Today, I want to go through all of my stats and achievements from 2019, and share with you my goals for the future.


In 2019…

-I made 179 posts on The Diplomat’s Digest (up from just 62 posts in 2018)

-I received 101 comments, 1,361 likes, 13,533 views, and 9,801 unique visitors. 7,500 of those views were from search engines, so thanks, Google! 

-I wrote 190,766 words, up from 50,422 words in 2018. As of today, I have written 278,689 words altogether! That’s the equivalent of a 1,000 page book. 

-I started my “Weekly Newsletter” feature as a way to document my day-to-day life in an online diary form. It’s so rewarding and interesting to look back on past entries and see, in detail, what exactly was happening in my life at that exact time.


Really, the best birthday gift I can ask for in April is the gift of writing and having a platform to share my work. I love seeing my progress grow and evolve as the years go by, and I’m so excited to see how much things change by April 2021! I can’t even begin to imagine what my life is going to be like in a year. If you had told me in April 2019 that this would be the year I’d find so much love and happiness, I’m not sure I would have believed you. My goals for the future are simply to continue my adamant posting schedule and hopefully upgrade to a premium plan once I can afford it. I’m so excited to see how my content changes over the next few months and years. Thanks for sticking around and joining me for the ride!

Disclaimer: discussions of sexual topics.

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Photo by Steve Johnson on Pexels.com

This has been an article I’ve wanted to write for a while, but I never knew how to get started or what I should even say. Now that I’ve really put a lot of thought into it, I think I have a pretty well-rounded idea of why my public school upbringing bothered me so much: queer history and education was completely left out of the curriculum.

By the time I was thirteen years old, I knew I had strong feelings for other girls. That being said, I wasn’t comfortable with this realization about myself, and I certainly tried to ignore that this part of me even existed. In fact, I didn’t even begin to really think critically about my sexuality until I reached my first year of college, and I think the way my public school system handled LGBT+ issues contributed to that substantially. So let’s take a trip down memory lane together and discuss how society pushes a heteronormative agenda onto the developing minds of young people!

When I was in middle school and even high school, I don’t remember any LGBT+ characters, stories, literature, and media being brought up in my classes. I don’t think a single homosexual reference showed up throughout my entire curriculum, and I never questioned it when I was growing up. Additionally, when I took my mandatory health class in 8th grade, homosexual health education was never mentioned as well. I never learned about how gay people have sex, or how we queer people also have to protect ourselves from STDs, just like any other human being. In a simple sense, we were erased, and made to feel like our sexualities weren’t valid. Even worse, I felt like just my existence as a gay person in a classroom was inherently inappropriate due to the lack of LGBT+ acceptance and exposure. Because my community wasn’t being brought up, I very quickly got the message that my school (and many other schools) do not see this “lifestyle” as a valid depiction of human experiences. It taught me that I should be ashamed of where I come from and what I believe in.

Dear public high school, including the existence of gay people in a classroom discussion does not mean you are forcing a gay agenda on anyone. Acknowledging all types of sexual wellness does not mean you are “turning students gay.” If you’re a student or a teacher and you really have a problem with the fact that girls date other girls, I think it’s time for you to take several seats and realize that it’s not 1832 anymore. Accepting my gayness does not threaten your fragile heterosexuality in any way. And lastly, if you do have a problem with it, why don’t you just be quiet? Yes, you’re entitled to feel and think however you wish, but I’m also entitled to a fair, informative, well-rounded education. 

In the future, I’d like to see some sort of change or development in health class culture. If you’re currently in high school and you’re going through a similar problem or feeling of suppression, my advice to you is this: Don’t be afraid to speak out. Unless you actively use your voice or bring up to your school the problems you are noticing, things are unlikely (and probably impossible) to change. It can be scary to stand up for what you think is right, but regardless of the outcome, it’s always worth it to try. 

You know, I was kind of hoping the Juleen Chronicles would sort themselves out by now, but the tea is still piping hot, and the drama still ensues. Like I said in Part I, it’s never my goal to piss off Julia and Eileen by picking them apart, but I am a writer and I enjoy publishing social commentary. So here we are.

Today I’m going to be explaining the events that have ensued since August, summarizing what other people think about the situation, summarizing what Eileen and Julia themselves think about the situation, and of course, including my own thoughts as well. And believe me, I have plenty.

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Photo from Instagram

So, where did we leave off? Julia bailed Eileen out of the clink, and as of now, we’re still waiting for Eileen to make a video explaining her legal experience. She did put out an odd, uncomfortable video trying to justify her shady behavior back in September, but that honestly only raised more questions instead of putting the issue to rest.

Here’s the thing that I don’t think Julia and Eileen realize. They’re “social media influencers,” right? Which means they have no problem with putting most of their lives on the internet (and trust me, I’ve seen way more of Eileen’s naked body on YouTube than I ever wanted to). Obviously, Julia and Eileen are trying to push this narrative that they don’t care what anybody thinks about them; you can judge them all you want and they’re going to keep insisting that they don’t pay it any mind. Begone, bots! Right, Eileen?

Except, that’s not the case at all. Julia and Eileen clearly care VERY much what people think about them and their relationship. Their uncomfortable attachment reminds me a bit of the relationship between Norman Bates and his mother in Bates Motel. They constantly try to tirelessly sell themselves to the internet, leaving uncomfortable, sappy, borderline creepy messages upon each other’s pages. And then, the second a single person steps in and expresses concern, BOOM, you’re branded a hater. Or a bot. Or an ageist homophobe.

As a queer woman and a person who has been surrounded by friends and ex partners much older than me, I’m going to go ahead and reject all of those labels. So sit back, relax, and get ready for round two of my thoughts and feelings. 

Let’s start with the red flags I, and many others, have seen popping up all over Julia’s YouTube channel and social media. By the way, I recommend watching the YouTube video titled “Why I’m Worried About Julia Zelg”, which was taken down by the original uploader and later reposted by a user named “bee.” I don’t agree with all of the points in that video, particularly about Eileen being a cold-blooded abuser. I definitely think the video creator was projecting her own life experiences a bit, without enough factual evidence to back up claims of abuse in Juleen’s case. Do I think Eileen is kinda annoying and a manipulative liar? Absolutely. Do I think there’s enough evidence to declare her an abusive partner? Not particularly. That being said, she did have some valid points, especially about the dangers of whirlwind romances and moving relationships along too quickly.

Coming from the biggest hopeless romantic on the planet, I understand how tempting it can be to get caught up in fast-paced love affairs and seemingly perfect partners. You see everything you want to see, and reject the things you don’t want to see as they gradually pop up. 99% of the time, it leads to an unhealthy relationship in which true thoughts and feelings are bottled up. The fact that Julia and Eileen married after less than a year of dating makes the entire trainwreck so much worse. I mean, Julia literally made the most substantial and legally binding commitment to another human that you can. No matter what Julia’s feelings about Eileen are at this point, I highly doubt she’s willing to face the harsh reality of divorce right now. It kind of reminds me of the Kim Kardashian + Kris Humphries scandal; can you imagine Julia’s embarrassment if she divorced Eileen after less than a year of marriage?

I think that in a lot of ways, Julia views Eileen has her security blanket. No matter how upset or annoyed she becomes with Eileen, she only clings onto her even more. The “you and me against the world” mindset only becomes stronger, especially in the face of “haters” and “bots.” I do want to talk about their rejection of constructive criticism in more detail a bit later, but for now, let’s start from the beginning of their whirlwind romance, and where I personally began to see the red flags popping up. 

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Photo from Instagram

There seems to be a stereotype that lesbians move relationships along quickly; I myself have even joked that I’m a “U-Haul Gay,” so I completely understand what it feels like to fall in love with someone and have the urge to rush things. However, that doesn’t mean it’s always the right thing to do, even if it may feel perfect at the beginning. There’s a name for this predicament: “The Honeymoon Phase.” It’s easy to ignore red flags and pretend you don’t notice criticism when you’re madly head over heels for someone, and Julia’s a pretty solid example of this. It’s also never a good idea to move in, propose to, and then marry someone all in the span of eight or nine months. Sure, there’s a chance it’ll work out and everything will go smoothly, but it’s predominantly more likely that you’ll end up discovering your partner’s “ugly side” the hard way. Or their criminal record. Or, you know, that first marriage they hid from you and blatantly lied about. Just the little things like that.

Of course, Julia didn’t know about any of this until after she’d been married to Eileen for a couple of months. Like I said before, I doubt she’s going to get a divorce after she just spent most of her life savings on a beautiful wedding. That doesn’t mean her frustrations and concerns aren’t bubbling, which brings me to my next point: Julia’s breakdowns on social media.

Obviously at this point, Julia was starting to get a lot of flack for her relationship with Eileen. I won’t deny that there are a few purposefully hurtful comments on Julia and Eileen’s videos, but to be honest, the majority of them aren’t “bullying” or “hate.” Most of these comments come from a well-intentioned place of concern (and rightfully, at that). Julia is a content creator with a social media presence; she has to know that when you put your life out on display like that, there will be people who throw in their own two cents. And that doesn’t mean they hate you, or that they’re ageist or homophobic. If anything, I think it shows that people really care. Especially in my situation- I adore Julia, and I think she’s good-hearted, but she’s so blind to the realities of her turbulent life. And it’s a tad frightening to watch. After the tragic passing of Julia’s grandfather, she hopped on YouTube to make a tearful video about the recent events of her life. I do believe she was genuinely upset about the passing of her grandfather, but the impression I got from that video is that something MUCH worse was going on behind the scenes. Not only her rocky relationship with Eileen, but also the dozens of comments basically telling Julia to run. I’m not surprised it pushed her over the edge. Instead of actually considering that people may be trying to help her, Julia’s allowing herself to spiral deeper into a sense of chaos- and the cracks are starting to show. 

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Photo from YouTube.com

Perhaps the newest and most alarming drama in Julia’s life is centered around her ever-changing appearance, including ballooning lips, a face full of botox, and now, drilled-down teeth which have been replaced by veneers. Julia has been trying to assure her fans that she’s entitled to do whatever she wants with her body, and she certainly is, but that doesn’t wipe away all of the very valid concerns her fans have voiced. For example, Julia has very vocally expressed on her channel that she deals with body dysmorphia, an eating disorder, and severe self esteem issues. I personally don’t think it’s wise for someone who’s clearly not in a healthy mental state to go through so many irreversible cosmetic changes. Yes, the fillers are technically “temporary,” but continuing to use them for prolonged periods of time can be terrible for your skin. Also, the veneers? FOR REAL? Julia had perfectly lovely teeth before, and there’s absolutely no reason she had to undergo such a serious and PERMANENT procedure to “fix” them. As of right now, Julia’s veneer vlog has its comments disabled, likely due to the large amount of backlash she received. 

On that note, back to the rejection of criticism I was talking about before. At this point, I can imagine Julia’s under a lot of stress when you combine her crooked wife, her constant online backlash, and her apparent ongoing body issues. Rather than thinking critically about the comments that are coming her way, I think Julia has basically reverted to a state of panic and self destruction. I’m sure Eileen coddling her along and telling her that we’re all “haters” isn’t really helping matters. 

With that being said, there are actually a couple of empathetic things that I would like to say on Julia’s behalf. I’ve noticed that she’s been under a lot of scrutiny lately, especially around her appearance, and I do genuinely worry about her mental health during these dark days of her life. Even though I also agree that her new, invasive cosmetic procedures are alarming, and the direction of her channel and her marriage are problematic at best, I want to encourage everyone to at least be gentle with Julia. Even if you feel compelled to comment on the situation, like I am obviously doing right now, there’s no need to be hurtful, rude, hateful, or make her feel worse about herself. I’m sure she does hear what we’re saying in the back of her mind, but right now, the scrutiny overload is probably crazy for her and I doubt she’s going to really listen to any of us. All we can really hope for is that she’ll have an epiphany and turn her life around- not for OUR sake, but for her own. I truly wish her the best with everything, even if that means filing for divorce from Eileen and re-starting her own social media presence. Like many of us have said before, we want the old Julia back.


If you’re interested in reading part one, here it is: https://diplomatsdigest.wordpress.com/2019/08/28/should-we-be-worried-about-julia-zelg/

Hi everyone! I hope you’re all adjusting nicely now that Christmas is over. That being said, New Years is right around the corner, so the festivities aren’t over yet! For my final article of blogmas, and my final article of 2019 at that, I’m going to be sharing with y’all what I got for Christmas. A majority of these things are from my mother, as I only live with her, but I also received a few things from friends and relatives. Let’s get into it!


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As many of you know, Eli is my best pal in the whole world. We’ve been friends for about eight years, and one thing I know about Eli very well is that he’s not great at remembering to buy gifts. Not that I feel entitled or that I expect him to- it’s just something I’ve noticed that he tends to let birthdays and holidays slide (and that includes everyone, even his family). So, this was the long introductory way of saying I was totally shocked when Eli bought me this stuffed animal heating pad! Yes, it is soft and fluffy, and yes, I have been sleeping with it every night. I found it to be especially thoughtful because Eli lives thousands of miles away, and I don’t get to see him very often, so this lil guy is sort of like a reminder that Eli is always with me. You know, in a sappy way.


So recently, my mom bought a candle from TJ Maxx called “Alpine Frost.” Please believe me when I say this is one of the most splendid candles I have ever smelled, and I remind my mother how much I love it constantly. Here is my evidence: 

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So it came as no surprise when she gave me my own alpine frost candle for Christmas, and yes, I was very excited about it! I’m telling you, Alpine Frost is absolutely delightful. If you find one at TJ Maxx, I highly suggest buying it. She also bought me a candle called “Berry and Spruce,” which is equally lovely and delectable-smelling. I love having candles going while I chill around the house and get writing done, and I especially love winter scents!

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This next gift was actually for my mother and I, gifted to us by our lovely neighbor, Rocky. These are Bond Touch bracelets, and basically, it means my mom and I can send each other little “buzzes” through the bracelet to remind the other person that we’re thinking of them! It’s so incredibly wholesome, and my mom and I have already gotten such a good use out of them. The bracelets literally vibrate when the other person sends you an alert, and also lights up in the color of your choosing. This was such a thoughtful and well thought-out gift, because my mom and I are incredibly close and I miss her when I go away to school. Now, we can stay BONDed for life! (Get it?)


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This notebook was another thoughtful gift from a different neighbor, my lovely friend JoAnn. I love the vibrant pattern of the cover, and the lined pages are going to be perfect for planning out Analog content and meetings! As many of you know, I’m a huge fan of stationary and anything that has to do with writing, so I always love receiving a notebook or a journal. I’ve already started filling out the pages with notes and future content, and I’m looking forward to using to more in the future. Thank you, JoAnn!


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Because JoAnn is apparently an absolute angel, she also bought me this cute ‘lil eyeshadow palette by Colourpop. I love warm-toned copper eye looks, as many of you can probably tell from my pictures, so this is a perfect palette for me. I’ve also never used Colourpop cosmetics before, and I have to say, the blendability and performance of these colors is amazing! Now that I’ve tried one of their palettes, I’m totally tempted to pick up some of their monochromatic additions. Eyeshadow palettes are definitely my favorite makeup item, so I’m always happy to receive one as a gift. 


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Aaand, here’s another one! I made a very short Christmas list this year, but this palette was one of the two items on there. I’m pretty sure it was NikkieTutorials who I saw using this, and that’s what inspired me to try it myself. I love that there’s a combination of practical and bright colors, and from what I’ve gathered from using the palette so far, the pigmentation is absolutely amazing. Mom, if you’re reading this, thank you for the palette! Apparently you can only get it from England, so I appreciate that she paid for that Royal Shipping. Mom, you the littest. 


From here on out, the rest of the items are things that my mom got me. Apparently I was a good daughter this year, because she got me some really beautiful, thoughtful things that I’m very appreciative of. I genuinely love everything she picked out for me! This coat in particular is one of my favorite gifts from Christmas (it’s a close second behind the Alpine Frost candle). I love the warm inner lining of the coat, and of course, the fake fur is a stunning touch as well (yes, it’s fake, don’t worry!). I’ve already worn it out on a hike with Duke, and as you can see, he’s very excited about the coat as well.

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Another lovely gift my mom purchased for me was this 25 Lb weighted blanket. As some of you who also struggle with mental health probably know, weighted blankets are amazing for helping with anxiety and insomnia. I’m not sure what the exact science is, but I know it’s very similar to the way deep pressure therapy works. Anyway, I really appreciated that my mom bought me this because it felt validating, in a way. I’ve been using it for the past few nights, and wow, I’m having a hard time getting out of bed! This thing is absolutely amazing. My sleep has already tremendously improved from where it used to be (y’all OGs will remember), but this blanket is helping me even more. I’m looking forward to bringing it back to school with me and *hopefully* continuing these healthy sleep patterns.


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I love my makeup, as you know, so that also means I need a way to carry my makeup around. I’ve never really owned a nice makeup bag because I didn’t feel like investing in one, so for the past couple of years I’ve been carrying it around in a gallon Ziploc bag. So it comes as no surprise that my mom was gracious enough to give me this lovely makeup bag for Christmas. The material is super sturdy and soft, and I love that it’s big enough to hold even my giant eyeshadow palettes. It was a lovely Christmas addition, so thank you again, mom!


The last few things were essentials that I am always running out of- toothpaste, socks, and headphones. I always appreciate toiletries, because like I said, I’m always running out of things like toothpaste and face wash while I’m at school. I’m really appreciative of everything she bought me, from the blanket to the socks, and I know that she appreciated the things I bought for her as well. It was a really lovely Christmas, and I had such a warm, cozy time spending time with her and the rest of my family. And that, of course, is the best gift of all 🙂


That wraps up Blogmas and 2019! Thank you so much for a year of kind comments, memories, and love. I’ve already started my articles for 2020, and I’m hoping that you’ll love them as much as I do. Have a lovely day everyone!

With the end of the year coming to a close, I decided it was time to revisit the resolutions I set for myself at the end of 2018. Here is a quick report of how I did:


-Write a book about my life. ✘ I actually started, but I never ended up finishing it. Maybe next year… 

-Have fifty followers on WordPress. ✔ I was genuinely shocked at how quickly I surpassed fifty. It was a goal for the entire year, but the number went over fifty within the first month of writing this. In total, I currently have 208 followers.

-Have 100 followers on my Diplomat’s Digest Instagram page. ✔ I reached 100 in November!

-Dye my hair a new color; maybe teal again!  ✔ I did that! I got my hair dyed teal in mid March, and I absolutely love it. Right now, it’s blonde. 

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-Get my driver’s license. ✘ Nope, not this year, but definitely the next!

-Host a collaboration on my blog. ✔ Check! Got that done in January, actually. As of right now, I have completed two collaborations for the entire year.

-Host a giveaway on my blog (!) ✘ Not quite yet, but hopefully soon!

-Figure out how to properly use wet-set foam rollers. ✘ I kind of cut off all my hair…

-Buy an authentic 1940s dress. ✘ Nope, I saved my money. See my last resolution 😉 

-Learn how to knit something besides a scarf. ✔ Does a dish cloth count?

-Go to bed and wake up a little bit earlier every day. This could be tricky, as I am a notorious night owl… ✔ I surprisingly did this. I usually get into bed between 8pm-9pm, and I’m asleep before 10 if I take a unisom and a melatonin pill. 

-Learn how to manage my money better. I struggle with this big time. Do you guys have any tips for managing money? ✔ I saved $1,000 over the summer, so I’d consider that successful finance management! 


Looking back, I’m pretty happy with the progress I made on my resolutions this year! 7/12 certainly isn’t bad. I noticed while looking back at my list that many of these goals were materialistic based, and I’d like to change that going forward. For 2020, I’d like to focus more on personal milestones, such as maintaining my happiness and continuing to spread gratitude. My 2020 resolutions will be published on January 1, so keep your eyes out for that!