Sunday, March 8
I have to say, I’m loving the fact that it’s starting to stay lighter out for longer and the weather is starting to freshen up as well. I had a pretty productive weekend, I would say. I wrote a couple papers, revised my big, important ethics paper, and even had time to play The Sims for hours and hang out with my friends. Last night, I listened to some music and painted glass bottles with my good friend, Alanis, and I have to say that I love the way it came out! The Kiss by Gustav Klimt is one of my all-time favorite paintings, so I knew I wanted to incorporate it onto my bottle. I feel very proud of it, and I hope I can keep it and cherish it forever.
The night before last, I hung out with Buck and my friends, Kelsey and Cameron. We ended up playing cards for at least a couple hours, which I’ve recently discovered I have a love for. Apparently, I’m not very good at Egyptian Rat Screw and Bullshit, but Kelsey and Buck are. We also played Crazy Eights, which seemed to drag on forever because none of us could win!
So anyway, it’s been a really lovely weekend, and I feel very well-rested as well. It’s a bit after seven in the evening right now, and I’m currently sitting in an empty classroom listening to The Beach Boys. Buck will be out of work in a couple hours, and we’ll probably sit on the roof (and not kick off the moss) for awhile and listen to the Grateful Dead or John Denver, or something along those lines. He’ll probably drink some whiskey, which makes him taste like brown sugar, and I’ll probably drink some Earl Gray tea. And per usual, I’m sure it will be lovely to fall asleep next to him with the window still open.
Monday, March 9
It’s absolutely gorgeous out today, so I’m spending the afternoon at the beach with my good friend, Erin. Apparently it’s supposed to snow on Wednesday, but I have no idea how that would even be possible, considering it’s currently seventy degrees out. I must say, even though I’m not a big fan of the warm weather, it does feel good to wear shorts and stretch out in the sand. I probably should have been working on my ethics paper draft, but oh well, that can be done later.
I hope you’re all staying safe and healthy out there, wherever you are in the world. The coronavirus is scary, especially to hypochondriacs like me, so make sure you continue to wash your hands and take care of yourself!
Tuesday, March 10
It’s another day of beautiful weather here in Massachusetts, and I’m in pretty high spirits, even though I’m quite tired. Daylight Savings Time has really thrown me off! That being said, I’m loving the fact that the sun is staying out longer, and the days seem to stretch out much more now. I finally finished the final draft of my ethics paper, which is a huge weight off my shoulders. I know I’ve probably sounded like a broken record, complaining about it every night this week! I’m a bit nervous because I need to pass this paper to pass the entire class, but I’m pretty sure I will be fine. It’s just the notion that my entire degree depends on this paper that freaks me out and makes me doubt myself.
I’m really looking forward to going home Saturday morning, particularly since it’s my father’s birthday and I finally feel ready to see him again. We have a complicated relationship, but I have an optimistic feeling that everything will go well and we might be able to start rebuilding things. I’m also very excited to see my dog, of course, who I haven’t seen since winter break and I miss terribly. And, perhaps most excitingly, Buck is coming to visit me for 2-3 days towards the end of winter break! We’ve been inseparable since we got together, so those first few days without him are going to be so hard for me. Oh, to be young and in love.
Wednesday, March 11
Good morning, everyone! I hope you’re all staying happy and healthy this week. On the topic of health, the coronavirus hubbub is now front and center in Boston, and there’s certainly a lot of gossip going around. My school has not formally announced any closings, but I suppose it’s very possible they could ask us to stay home after spring break next week. Because nothing is set in stone, I’m trying not to think too much about it, but it’s still an interesting possibility. For one thing, it would suck to be away from my friends and my boyfriend. Secondly, if the school shut down and moved to online classes, I have no idea what would happen with my internship. Would I start working remotely for that as well? Thirdly, what happens to financial aid? Do I still have to pay for room and board even if I’m not on campus? It’s a complicated subject, and I’m not sure what will happen. At the same time, it’s kind of exciting to witness all of this. I guess we’ll see what happens!
Anyway, I’m in my 8am right now, and I have two more classes left after this. I might take a nap after my last class, because Daylights Saving Time is still throwing me off a bit and I’m exhausted. I’m also planning on hanging out with Erin and Buck tonight, so we’ll see how I’m feeling this evening.
Thursday, March 12
What a strange time to be alive and documenting my life on the internet.
With the obviously overwhelming coronavirus panic now taking over Boston, I’ve been forced to think a lot about the possibility that my school may close after spring break, which would be (in my opinion) wildly unfortunate and an overreaction to the situation. I’m going to publish an article on Analog next week to explore that topic more deeply for anyone who’s interested.
I’m also quite stressed over applying for jobs, because many of the jobs I’m inquiring for have hundreds of applicants. If I can’t find a job, I can’t get an apartment, and I’m supposed to do that in June. Also, one of my potential housemates is dropping out because she can’t afford to move. Also, my mom is moving two states away in June and I’m not going to have anywhere to live after she moves. Also, my internship is probably shutting down next week as well.
So yeah, I’m a bit stressed by the enormity of the crazy world around me right now. Last night, I essentially had a mental breakdown in the library and cried on my laptop, because I just don’t see how any of this is going to pan out and fix itself within the next three months. Even more, I don’t even know where to begin. I can’t move into an apartment without a credit score/cosign or a gross household income, which I don’t have due to a lack of a job. I might not even have my friends and my boyfriend around me during this time, if my college decides to pull the plug and shut its doors. Oh, what a time to be alive.
I almost feel like I have to laugh at the absurdity of everything. My goals today are to apply to two more jobs, decide what day I’m going home for spring break, decide if I want to tour the apartment that I have my eye on (but probably can’t afford because my housemates are dropping like flies), and desperately attempt to find a new roommate. Everything else in my life (minus my friends and Buck) just feels so unimportant right now. I hardly even care about my schoolwork right now, because I’m so bent out of shape about all of this.
Anyway, I don’t want to sound like I’m throwing a pity party. At least I am healthy and safe, and I have a strong support system around me. I just hate having things pan out undecided and up in the air, if that makes sense. It especially stresses me out not knowing where I’m even going to be living in three months, or where my income will come from.
The first thing I’m going to do when I get home for break this weekend is take a bubble bath, pour myself a drink, and binge out on The Office. Honestly, it’s what I deserve.
Friday, March 13
As you can probably imagine, shit is going down over here in ole Massachusetts. My university has extended its spring break by an extra week, and then, all of our classes are going to resume online. Despite this, our residence halls and services are staying open for the rest of the semester to those who wish to stay, and everyone else is allowed to go home. As for graduation and all of that, nobody has any answers or ideas about what will happen. Also, we’re technically not supposed to be within six feet of each other at school, and we can’t have any guests or other students in our dormitories. I’ll honor that expectation with my friends, but my boyfriend? Yeah, that six feet rule is gonna be a no from me dawg. My college can take away my classes, my graduation, my internship, my activities, and my clubs, but I refuse to cut myself off from my closest support system during this crisis of my life. And that’s the tea, sis.
Anyway, I’m going to tour an apartment tomorrow with my friend, and then my mom is coming to pick me up from school first thing on Sunday morning. As you can probably imagine, I’m really looking forward to relaxing during spring break and trying not to think about my university fiasco. This is definitely not the way I want to be spending my final year of college, but hey, I just have to make the best of it. At least I’ll still be able to come back to campus after spring break and see most of my close friends to finish off what has been a sufficiently chaotic school year. Of course, even that’s subject to change if things get worse. My fingers are crossed.